why can't they put their child first?

[mynana2005]

I just don't understand why some parents can't put their child first.  I'm talking about my son and his girlfriend, but I'm sure their not the only ones who have done this.

Anyway, my son has been unhappy for a long time and losing his dad in November before the holidays didn't help much, but his relationship with his girlfriend, who is the mother of my adorable grandson, has been a forced relationship from the beginning and they just can't seem to get along.  I know it's mostly his fault because he doesn't want to break it off with her for the sake of my grandson, but he doesnt help the relationship when he goes out and drinks with his friends after work every night and doesnt come home to his girllfriend and son, which makes her very upset and she gets mad and blames it on the alcohol.  She has no clue that he doesnt want to spend the rest of his life with her, she forgot to take her birth control and got pregnant and he was trying to be the man and take care of his responsibilities, and he's done really good, he went to school got a good job, she's working, they're suppose to be getting their own place soon and now this, and where is their son? caught in the middle :-( I just dont understand :-( 

For those of you who don't know me, my grandson's name is Gabriel, he's the most adorable, loving little boy I've ever met, he's snuggable, lovable and simply irresistable, he lives with his parents, who are a mess, and they all live with me and his grandpa. 

His mother only had him because she believed she could force his dad into marrying her if she was having his child, she didn't even tell him, or anyone for that matter, that she knew he was down's before he was born, I guess she thought it would matter, it wouldnt have but not telling the truth would, my son doesnt like to be lied to and she has lied to him several times, I've listened to her repeatedly lie, constantly changing her story trying to keep from getting in to trouble and digging herself deeper.

What I don't appreciate is what they're doing to Gabe.  He's totally innocent and needs alot of love and attention, all he gets is passed from one grandma to another, he usually spends most of the week with his great-grandma and other grandma and from thurs evenings to monday some time he spends with his grandpa and me.  The only time he gets therapy is on weds. and whenever his grandpa and I have him and are able to spend some time working with him.  He's still having seizures and his eeg's dont look good, this child needs alot of work and one on one attention and all he gets is passed around.  His great-grandma baby's him and lives with her boyfriend who chain smokes so he comes home smelling like cigarettes and his other grandma smokes marijuana so he comes home from her house smelling like marijuanna and some type of dirty house smell that I can't put my finger on.  The only time he has any kind of stability is when he's with us, I dont know what to do, its very frustrating because he isnt my child so I cant enforce anything and it isnt my place to do anything about it, if there was anything that I could do.  I believe his parents will be splitting up after last night and I'm hoping to still have him at least on the week-ends.

I wish there was something I could do, but all I can think of is to just be there for Gabe and give him all the love and attention he so greatly deserves when ever I have him.

Thank you for listening and please keep us all in your prayers, especially Gabe.

~Melody

[RyansJourney]

Jan. 10, 2008 at 5:42 PM Oh God, my heart is broken for Gabe. I just love that little guy. I will pray for him that he finds peace in his little life. Gabe is so very lucky to have you and your husband as Grandparents. You have a kind heart, I can tell by the way you always speak about Gabe. I wish for the very best for Gabe, he's a little angel. God bless sweetheart!