"I'll always remember her mommy" My amazing 8 year old

[4boysNme]

Well to quickly sum up the story (I have a tendency to ramble). I have lost two of my younger siblings to car accidents. The first was my 3 year old brother Jamin who was my only friend and the center of my five year old world. His death destroyed my family as I had known it. The second was twenty years later. In 2004 we lost my sister Katie. She was 16 and was hit by a car crossing the street on her way to school. She was by far my favorite sibling since the loss of my brother and regardless of our 8 yr. age difference which could make us tiff we are the closest of the girls. This was by far the hardest of the many many deaths I have had to deal with in my short lifetime. But this was thee hardest because of my son Nathaniel. Katie was the "SUN" in Nathaniel's universe. He adored her as much as a 4 yr old can care for a person. I truly believe he could have turned his back on me without strife as long as he had his "ICKY" (He couldn't pronounce Aunt Katie when he was little and it stuck). This tragedy rocked his world as well as his belief system. He still panics when kids are in the street and a car comes driving down the road. We were worried about him making it through this but he seemed to start healing and the birth of his little twin brothers last year helped. He has had a hard time when people talk about her but with his brothers he is their "ICKY" and the storyteller of Nate & Kate's adventures together. Well yesterday was her birthday. She would have been 20. My baby girl would have been 20!! I still get teary eyed that my little ones will never have their "Icky"...I'm tearing up now but yesterday it was really hitting me and without knowing what day it was Nathaniel brought her up. So I decided I wanted to go to church and pray and light a candle for her. Not a normal ritual for me but something I thought would bring me a little peace. I decided to make it a Nathaniel and Mommy trip. Nathaniel didn't know exactly what was supposed to happen( I don't push religion on my kids whatever makes them happy) but he enjoyed lighting the candle and talking to God about his Katie. When I tried to explain it all after we left I said that we went because it was Katie's birthday and we were going to light a candle and pray so we could remember her. He turned to me in his infinite wisdom and said..." I don't need to pray or light a candle I remember her everyday mommy and she knows it cause she's an angel in heaven and watches over us". Amazing...and this whole time I thought I was the smart one and I was comforting him.LOL I love this kid. Sorry so long but thanks for listening

[snailteacher]

Jan. 12, 2008 at 7:49 PM awww.  Your son sounds amazing! 

[bjacob1035]

Jan. 12, 2008 at 7:53 PM I know I am prejudiced (I'm his grandma), but Nathaniel is a caring, sweet boy.  And it is all due to his loving Mom! (with a little help from Marcos)

[Scrap-n-chat]

Mar. 3, 2008 at 2:46 PM This wasn't long at all and what  an angel you have in your very midst! I am so sorry for you losses and thank you for sharing this, made me tear up for sure. Big warm hugs your way and give one to your sweet son for me. =O)