The rules: once you have been tagged, you have to write a journal entry with 10 random facts or habits about yourself. At the end, you choose 10 new people to be tagged. Don't forget to leave a comment that says "You've been tagged!" on their profile and tell them to read your latest journal entry! (anyone who read this... you're TAGGED! now get going!)

10)  While I hate what I have gone through, and would trade it back if I had the chance, I really enjoy learning how important friends and family are to just everyday life...

 9)  You MUST have a good support system to get through things like this, that is why I LOVE CafeMom and all my moms on here....  I seriously couldn't get through this all without you guys, as I truely am very private and can't usually talk about this with too many others....  No one understands, and I feel that I can say ANYTHING to you guys, because if you don't like it, or I don't like the response, I can just delete the person, or just not care....  It is weird, but I feel I can say anything on here since you guys don't know me.  But when I know people I know will look at this, I almost feel embarassed...  It is strange...  But I love to look at everything and talk to everyone...  I am very quiet but once you get to know me, you can't get me to shut up...

 8)  I love to read, ANYTHING.... I love to read posts, journals, books, magazines.  I love Dean Koontz books, all are great, Stephen King, I sometimes like to read romance books, I feel silly and embarassed sometimes, but sometimes I just need to read something like that....

 7)  I love ice cream and chocolate, and I LOVE Girl Scout Thin Mint cookies...  I was a Girl Scout for 10 years and got a 10-year pin.  :)

 6)  I love to help people...  Even when I don't know them, I always try to help everyone that I can...  Even with stupid things like finding a phone number, if I happen to know it, I WILL interrupt and try to help...  I feel that there is no point in me staying quiet, knowing you are looking for something, and let you look for 10 minutes, when I could have opened my mouth and told you the number to begin with....  (And I hate when people make fun of me for doing that...  A manager used to do that, and now she is no longer a manager...  evil grin and laugh...  heehee....  I cut HER down to size....  (She was a bad manager anyway and just didn't like me because I am younger, got the boss to compliment me all the time on how GREAT of a job I was doing and he would brag all the time, and it just PISSED her off and she never liked me, she would also make fun of me, ignore me, and not help get the job done, but would yell at me when it wasn't done, EVEN though I asked her to help me....))

 5)  I bit my lip, chew the inside of my cheeks, bite the skin right beside your nail, and pick at my steering wheel cover when I am anxious, nervous, or upset.  (I have a cool steering wheel cover, with gel grips at three points of the cover, the rest is leather(fake) but I have picked at it so much that two of the leather sides are gone and it is just the rubber cover, but the gel is still barely holding on....)

 4)  I love to hear of children, see children, but lately it just upsets me so much when others announce they are pregnant...  I am filled with so much jealousy, and then if they happen to lose the child(ren), I am filled with so much remorse, thinking I somehow caused it....  I then feel horrible because I feel that somehow, in someway, I could have changed my attitude and this wouldn't have happened to them...

 3)  I used to be a happy, carefree, always cheerful person....  But I don't know how to feel that way again, I feel forever changed and don't like it....  I seem to be filled with dread of what could happen and am very sad and mellowed out more and more often....

 2)  I am in school to get my Computer Information Systems degree and LOVE that I am one of only a few girls getting this degree...  I am excited to get into a career that not many women are in and prove that I can do it just as well as any man... :)

 1)  I hope everyone still likes me after hearing all this....  I always have to make people like me, I hate when people don't like me....  Though it sucks lately making friends, because I just feel down and while there is a good reason, I don't feel that they really know me, or they know who I am now and not what I used to be, a happy person.... 

I don't know....  I hope you learned something and I hope to still get to know all of you....

To you all:  Thank you for being my friend, putting up with my moping around, sadness, sad things....  I love you all and thank you for being my friend...  :)

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Comments:

LYNDELOU
Feb. 1, 2008 at 2:01 PM

Hi Sweetie~ First and foremost NEVER let anyone make you feel bad about who you are and how you feel.Real / True Friends will except you know matter what..As many of your 10 things about you are very sad and I am sorry you have to feel this way, and I am truly sorry that your sad now from the loss of your child. Just know that you are thought of often..(((HUGS)))

OK my 10 things : Short and Sweet

1) I GIVE way to much of myself

2 ) I am spoiled by my husband beyond belief -( anything I want I get )

3 ) I HATE cold weather

4 ) I only eat 3-5 bites at each meal ( I don't like food and food don't like me )

5 ) I MUST get my nails done every 2 weeks ( including toes )..I don't like ugly nails on me

6 ) I have a massage therapist come to my home 3 times a month for a full body massage because I am to lazy to drive there.LOL

7 ) I drive fast and can't stand to get into a car with someone who drives S_L_O_W !

8 ) I am addicted to coffee ( black & strong )

9 ) I LOVE to swim in my free time - I used to be a lifeguard back in the good ole days.

10 ) I am having lots of trouble dealing with the death of my mother ( Passed 3-14-07 )

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goril...
Feb. 1, 2008 at 3:55 PM I understand so much of what you have to say. I have friends that hate to be tagged but I don't mind and so I will just respond to you.

1. I hate the word hate. But use it all the time.

2. I have OCD. It gets worse when I am stressed.

3. I have feelings of anger everytime I look at my Husband.

4. I have always been the glass is half empty knid of person.

5. I miss my Husband when he goes out of town for work, and when he comes home I can't wait till he is gone again.

6. I need to get back into couneling but don't want to keep talking about the same crap over and over that is bothering me.

7. I hate bieng out of Control. I always have to drive. So does my Husband so when we go somewhere as a family I am anxious all the time.

8. I suffer from Anxeity. Horrible panic attacks. I am on Meds for that and again hate that fact.

9. I Love my Children and would die for them if needed!

10. Gorillas are the only other Love in my life. They calm me no matter what is going on in my life.

Well as you can see I am very messed up and negative. I am trying to change my outlook on things but it is a long road to travel.

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Bethy16
Feb. 1, 2008 at 7:45 PM

Ok Here is Ten things but not in any order.

1. This has been the worst month of my life and I miss my daughter Sara Grace with all of my heart. But Like you it is amazing how many wonderful friends and how wonderful my family is!

2. My son Jordan is the reason I have made it this far. He is the love of my life!

3. I always knew I loved my husband Dave,but I have fallen so deeply in love with him again after loosing Sara.

4. I love my dogs like they are my children. I breed and show Dobermans.  I have 4 Dobes and 1 Min Pin.

5.I am the Go To one in my family. I guess it comes with  being the oldest out of 3. I will do anything for my family and friends.

6.This experience of loosing Sara has changed me in a way I can not describe. I guess you can say I am more serious then before. I was always the "laid back" one but now I worry more then I ever have.

7.I think I am a good person and I try to teach my son how to be a good person

8.I am not always so negitive and blah and someday I will be happy again.

9.I love to cook and make my family happy with good meals

10. I hate talking about myself :)

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nicawolf
Feb. 1, 2008 at 8:02 PM

I agree with Lyndelou, don't let anyone allow you to feel any different about yourself.  Angelmama, you and I have briefly spoken about our losses and I can tell you that the feelings that you are experiencing right now are perfectly normal.  However, the key is not letting the negative feelings bring you down in your everyday routines so that you become too depressed or possibly cause other health problems.  The best thing you can do for yourself is to talk, share, cry, vent, scream, and allow yourself to have happy times.  Unfortunately, when we women experience something like this we do have a tendency to be negative, dread everything, blame ourselves, and tell ourselves that we don't deserve to be happy.  That's wrong, we DO deserve to be happy.  Keep your head up sweetie and you can message me anytime, i am always there.  I have been through counseling myself and have been told all of this by a professional and have learned within time that she was right.  GOD has the ultimate plan (s) for us, GOD makes the ultimate decision but WE DO HAVE DAILY CHOICES and that is something that is a hard lesson learned sometimes.  Sweetie, I feel your pain, I hear your pain, but your pain is normal and from what I have heard from you, what you are doing is healthy.  Take care and remember, we do care and there are friends who will be there no matter what.

Ten things about me:

10.  I am addcited to coffee- day and night, I love coffee

9.   I get a little cranky when things don't go my way

8.  I too am very spoiled- I generally get what I want, it may take a while but I get it.

7.  I do not eat or drink healthy like I would like to.

6.  I am not able to have children; I do have an angel baby though.

5.  I can't save money- I love clothes, shoes, and girly stuff too much so it doesn't make it to the savings account. LOL

4.  I too dont care for the word Hate but I do use it.

3.  I do not like fake people or liars.

2.  I am very impatient

1.  I have a tendancy to be lazy.    

 

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kriszaz
Feb. 2, 2008 at 9:21 AM

I don't think any different of you, thanks for sharing your life with me, I would love to meet  you in person some day.  Are you married?  Just wondering how much support you have around you from family and good friends to just give you a big hug I would love to do that for you my friend

((((((((((((((((((((((hug)))))))))))))))))))  there it is hope to tty again soon You make my day your friend Krissy

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tweet...
Feb. 7, 2008 at 2:17 AM

1. I have OCD. Mild nothing major. I have to go back and check to make sure everything is off. If I send something in the mail, I am worried about it to I know it got to where it suppose to go.

2. When I had my own apartment eveything was pink and purple even the trash bags.

3. I can speak a little Spanish.

4. I just love the Latino culture.

5. When I can't sleep, I play cards games on the pc to make myslef sleepy.

6. I always open stuff like bottles and jars with my left hands, but I write with my right hand.

7. I always thanks God for waking me up in the morning.

8. If i'm sleeping by myself I have to have the tv on

9. I can pick things up with my toes.

10. When I send stuff off in the mail, I oray that it get there safe and to the right person.

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