So I just talked to him. It has been the most he has said to me in a long time. I do love him and wish he could be back here. I want to be in his arms knowing that he is safe with me. I hate that he is in danger there. I wish I had money so I could bring him home. Even if he came he would have no where to go. I always say I will not cry for him but its hard not to. At any time he could dye and my son would never get to meet his dad. I am wrong for doing it but I be with guys just to try to forget about him. It hurts and I shouldn't try to be with other guys. I want to be with him alone. Please Lord let him come back safe to us. We are his family and he needs to be here. He may never come back but I will wait forever for him. Why does money get in the way and there is no one to help us. Why hasn't my love for him faded away? It has been since Aug, of 2006 he left. I want him back so badly. I can't even save up to get him back on my own. Man this sucks. I don't know what to do anymore.

 JEFF: am gud but i know u have been talking to someone,,

Tracy (2/1/2008 9:41:51 PM): what, there is no one else
JEFF (2/1/2008 9:42:04 PM): how ahve u been
Tracy (2/1/2008 9:42:19 PM): good
Tracy (2/1/2008 9:42:56 PM): u scared me thinking something happened to u but u just didn't want to talk to me...thats mean to make me worry
JEFF (2/1/2008 9:43:09 PM): am sorry
JEFF (2/1/2008 9:43:15 PM): u know how thinbgs are
Tracy (2/1/2008 9:44:01 PM): u said march so still waiting
JEFF (2/1/2008 9:46:21 PM): am not sure'
Tracy (2/1/2008 9:47:15 PM): take a boat, swim something but come back
JEFF (2/1/2008 9:48:21 PM): lol
JEFF (2/1/2008 9:48:27 PM): where hav e u been
Tracy (2/1/2008 9:49:01 PM): just home, school, and work
Tracy (2/1/2008 9:49:14 PM): u think its funny but I really want to see u
JEFF (2/1/2008 9:50:03 PM): i see u went to nebraska,,u didnt tell me bout that
Tracy (2/1/2008 9:50:18 PM): no I didn't
JEFF (2/1/2008 9:50:28 PM): yea
Tracy (2/1/2008 9:50:40 PM): where does it say that?
JEFF (2/1/2008 9:52:20 PM): nowheer
Tracy (2/1/2008 9:52:37 PM): well u need to be back by aug.
JEFF (2/1/2008 9:53:04 PM): cant
JEFF (2/1/2008 9:53:16 PM): do u read the news
Tracy (2/1/2008 9:53:42 PM): u should have never left
JEFF (2/1/2008 9:53:59 PM): i know
Tracy (2/1/2008 9:54:00 PM): u should have never joked about marriage
JEFF (2/1/2008 9:54:30 PM): ohh
JEFF (2/1/2008 9:54:41 PM): wish u never got prego
JEFF (2/1/2008 9:54:53 PM): but u wanted to
Tracy (2/1/2008 9:55:03 PM): I didn't plan it
JEFF (2/1/2008 9:55:13 PM): u knwe it
Tracy (2/1/2008 9:55:35 PM): what u wouldn't be talking to me if I hadn't had him?
JEFF (2/1/2008 9:55:44 PM): i would
JEFF (2/1/2008 9:55:56 PM): but now its u n him and am not there
JEFF (2/1/2008 9:55:59 PM): i feel bad
Tracy (2/1/2008 9:56:29 PM): u wouldn't think about coming back if it was just me?
JEFF (2/1/2008 9:58:01 PM): i would stl
Tracy (2/1/2008 9:58:49 PM): u think I would get another man if I have waited this long for u?
JEFF (2/1/2008 9:59:03 PM): what u want
JEFF (2/1/2008 9:59:17 PM): yes u can
Tracy (2/1/2008 9:59:36 PM): thats messed up, u don't want to be with me
JEFF (2/1/2008 9:59:44 PM): i love you
JEFF (2/1/2008 9:59:57 PM): dont mess with those men on yourspace
JEFF (2/1/2008 10:00:09 PM): i read
Tracy (2/1/2008 10:00:27 PM): I don't talk to them and never met them
JEFF (2/1/2008 10:00:35 PM): u wanted to
Tracy (2/1/2008 10:00:39 PM): no
JEFF (2/1/2008 10:00:50 PM): my angels are watchin u
JEFF (2/1/2008 10:01:32 PM): i gotta go but i still love u
Tracy (2/1/2008 10:01:39 PM): k love u

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Feb. 2, 2008 at 12:23 AM

girl he is playing with your head and heart! he's not going to come back, he would of found away if he really did.  He said it he didn't want a kid...this is his way of not worrying about child support too.  Move on, don't believe him.  He is a sweet talker...i had one of those...messed around for four years with on and off relationships with him before I got over him totally and met my hubby.  Take care of you and your son, and do what you need to do.  Don't let a guy get in the way for anything. 

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