The Looks

[CookingEvie]

I'm going to be a mom. Again. As of today, I'm 7 weeks and 3 days pregnant. I'm happy, I'm scared, I'm anxious, I'm sick but most of all I'm beautiful. I know it may sound conceited but let me explain....

Have you ever walked down the street and seen a pregnant woman. Have you noteced that as soon as you look at her bell, it brings a smile to your face and a warm, loving feeling over your heart? You probably don't even know the persona dn most likely, you'll never see them again but for tha split second, you feel this amazing connection to her and the miracle that is growing inside of her. You look at her and think she's beautiful. Well, I feel like that.

I'm not showing yet so I'm not getting those looks from the strangers in the streets. I get those looks from my child's father. He thinks I don't see them but I do. We'll be sitting watching tv and he'll just reach over and lightly stroke my belly; the safe-haven for his child for the next 6 1/2 months. He talks about cribs and gliders and looks at other baby items with me. he talks to my 3 year old about the new baby and how she's going to be a big sister now. And I've caught him smiling very faintly as I walk past him with no clothing on just after my shower, as I'm rubbing lotion on my soon-to-be-HUGE stomach. That makes me feel beautiful. The way he kisses the back of my neck as he nuzzles into me to fall asleep, the way he wraps his arm over me and holds my belly as though to protect his child from any harm, and even the way he nags me to eat better and take my vitamins. All of these things make me feel beautiful.

Then there is my daughter, Suzie. She kisses the "baby" everyday; all day when possible. She asks when will she be able to play with the baby and feed it and change diapers. A couple of days ago she held her ear to my stomach and told me very seriously that the baby had talked to her. Upon asking what the baby had said, she exclaimed, "he quacked like a duckie mommy". I kow it's silly but what warms me is knowing that she already feels a some sort of connection to the new addition. This may even help with the transition. Sometimes, I look at her and say "Suzie, mommy feel fat today." She's look at me, smile, then hug me saying "You're not fat mommy, you have a baby. You're pretty." That makes me feel beautiful. She's lay next to my and fall asleep rubbing my belly. And that's when I fall asleep too.

 

To my family: I love you with all of my heart and there is no greater way to show your love to some than by bringing another life into the world, almost in their honor. This is my dedication of love to you.

[MommyKelley04]

Mar. 31, 2008 at 3:36 PM

This is SO sweet!  How precious :D

I think I am 4 weeks or so along, not sure.  I gotta make an appointment with the doctor.  I hope everything goes well for you, best of luck!!!