Searching for missing person

[MAdkins82]

Well, that missing person is me.  I have been a SAHM since I had my son 6 yrs ago.  Don't get me wrong, I love my kids and my family and they are my EVERYTHING.  I love that I get to be here while my dh makes the sacrifice of working long hours to support us.  And I thank him for that.  But before I had my kids and became "Mom", I used to be Misty.  Even though I was just a waitress at a bar, it made me feel good that I was the best there.  I had several customers that refused to let anyone else wait on them.  They told me, if you aren't here we walk to the bar ourselves.  No matter if it was my day off or not, if they were having a party there, they requested I come and do it.  That made me feel good that I meant something to people.  Now, like I said, I realize that the things I do are special to my family, but I just feel like what do I do that is so special?  I have tried so many things, I make candles, I want to go to school for MT, and now I have decided to try and bake cakes.  I just want to be known for doning something really good.  My dh doesn't understand bc he goes to his job and he knows he is the best at what he does.  I'm not that great person that everyone is like, oh she is soo nice.  I mean don't get me wrong, I am a nice person, and I will halp pretty much anyone, but Im not very outgoing anymore therefore it doesn't spread to a whole lot of people.  I just wish I knew who Misty was anymore....ya know?

[tiggerrrt]

Feb. 20, 2008 at 10:03 AM

It is hard, before kids you had an identity and too often after kids you become "Zach's Mom" and all your accomplishments seem to disappear...  BUT you are doing an amazing thing, you are raising a child, you are staying active, making a difference and are important.  Take pride in the fact you are doing something great! 

Also try to continue to do something for you!  One day the kids will be gone and you will want to do something for you. 

Lisa

[Gram12of15]

Feb. 20, 2008 at 10:05 AM It sounds like it's time for Misty to come out again.  Taking time for yourself makes you a better wife & mother.  You were given the gift you you long before you assumed the roles of wife & mommy - Misty is the core, the others are add-ons....without the core, the add-ons can't be as strong.

[Vanessa328]

Feb. 20, 2008 at 10:08 AM Im going thru the same feelings.  While my children were growing up I was a home daycare provider and when we left town because my xhusband was military a lot of the familys stayed home with the kids because they trusted noone else with them.  Its a warm fuzzy feeling inside to know that someone loves and trusts you so much.   And my girls are growing up and one has moved out recently and the next is graduating HS and getting ready to move on with her life and I just dont know what I am going to do with myself.  I was in a car accident back in october and have been on disability since.  Its been nice to be home and take care of her and my husband and be home when the oldest needs me or we meet to go have lunch or she picks me up to go grocery shopping together.  I totally get where you are coming from.  Before the accident I had the job I always wanted when the girls were young, figured now that they were older it was finally time for ME.  Well now I don't know that I will be able to that for a while so now what.  I can't even sit here and type without being in pain and feeling uncomfortable it is very frustrating.  Seems that bad things happen to good people, not all the time but sometimes.

[MAdkins82]

Feb. 20, 2008 at 11:33 AM Thank you guys, I guess I am just going through a little early mid life crisis.  lol.  I was just thinking the other day that my dh and I started calling each other "mommy" and "daddy" in the beginning bc we were new parents and it was soo exciting,  Then 1 1/2 years later when we had our 2nd child, my oldest was a just learning to talk so we called each other that to show him what to call us.  Now we have 3 and I'm not even sure we remember what our names actually are anymore.  Even in our conversations we refer to each other as "mommy" and "daddy".

(Original Poster)