Ex Husband driving me nuts!

[Lorrietori]

My ex husband is really getting on my nerves. He only usually comes around or calls when he wants something. He was diagnosed as bi-polar about 3 years ago and is not currently on his meds. He is nice one minute, depressed as hell the next, and when he's not either one of those, he's mean. He can be sweet as punch. but pitches fits like a two year old if he doesn't get his way. He will go weeks, sometimes months, without calling or seeing the kids and his excuse is always that he was depressed and didn't want the kids to see him that way. Most recently when he has done that is in December when he lost his job. He has been applying, but hasn't gotten one yet and is 3 months behind on child support. He was going to come and pick the kids up on a Wednesday and never showed up or called. Mariah tried calling him, but he would not answer his phone for about 2 weeks. I took her out to his house (he lives with his girlfriend about 5 miles away from us), and they were home but would not come to the door. When I finally went out there alone about 3 days later, he finally came to the door (after I almost knocked it down because I knew he was there), he said he was depressed again. Get over it buddy! I get depressed but I have 3 kids to think about! I guess he thinks "out of sight, out of mind". So anyway, he has come to see the kids three times since then and calls atleast twice a week. Now, he has been served papers to appear in court for non payment of child support and wants me to go to court with him to vouch for him! I wouldn't mind if he would be a responsible father and have a decent relationship with his kids. He is finally getting a job (I think, cross your fingers) and if he does, going to jail won't help that any. I went to court with him last time and sat there for 5 hours before we were called into the courtroom. It really makes me mad that he has done this yet again. And expects me to drop everything for him again. I know I should go to maybe ask the judge not to put him in jail, but maybe that is exactly what he needs to wake his stupid a$$ up! So anyway, he's driving me nuts! I think we were all better off when he was depressed and not speaking to any of us!

[Tena29006]

Mar. 13, 2008 at 9:36 AM Lorrie don't go to court for him.  It does nothing but shows him that you will do it time and time again.  Trust me, I have been in this same situation with my ex.  One time he was $4000.00 behind in child support and I actually told his mom to go borrow the money and run it through the court system and gave her the money back to pay off the loan.  Stupid me, because he asked me again the next time but I told him no I was not going to do that anymore.  I have went to court and vouched for him 2 or 3 more times and now he is $7000.00 behind.  I will never ever help him again because they come to expect it.   He was suppossed to show up for court 2 weeks ago and didn't and now they have put out a bench warrant for him.  I hope they get him and put him in jail.  He will somehow come up with the money but I would rather him be in jail then out because when he is out, he tries to tell my kids bad things about me and my new husband.  SO, it doesn't bother me if he is up in jail.  I use to not be like this but after all the things I have been through with him, I am just gettting really cold hearted toward him. I am not trying to tell you what to do but thats just the way I feel about it.  They don't care about us whenever we are forking out money to help support our kids, why should I feel sorry for him.  Just thought I would give you my opinion on it, but you make your own decision.  ttyl