My grandmother died Saturday.  It seems that she ran a fever of 120 (and yes I mean 120) Friday night.  By the the time my grandfather got back to the hospital Sat.  they had already had to put her on life support.  He ended up going home.  They had to call him back because she coded twice.  All we wanted was for my uncle to get in town to say good-bye.  He missed out by less then two and half hours.  The third time she coded, my grandfather said to stop. 

I wasn't there.  I went to my mom's house Friday for the weekend (it was spring break and I wanted the kids to go to the beach).  I didn't get a chance to say good-bye.  I haven't seen her since the end of Feb. .  It sucks!  People say they are sorry and if there's anything they can do for you.  What can you do?  What I need is 1. my grandmother alive 2. a friend that will let me get drunk and stupid and cry.  So, I've gotten drunk and that doesn't solve it.  The only thing it did was give me some sleep that I needed.  

Tomorrow the kids go back to school.  Gavin isn't a problem, but Hunter is.  His teacher and guidence counselor know.  They will watch out for him.  I have faith he'll be okay.  One day, I will be too,but just not today.

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