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Eff Off
- May 12, 2008 at 4:27 AM
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- Comments (10) Total Views (179) Everyone can see this journal post.
Dear Jerk Who Sleeps on Way More Than Your Share of MY Bed,
Next year a card would be nice. Or some flowers. Perhaps helping the kids make something sweet. Or stealing their chalk and scrawling Happy Mother's Day across the driveway. Or breakfast in bed. Or a day where I don't have to wipe boogers, booties or counters. Maybe a lunch date with the punk ass I chose to spend my life with.
In other words, anything besides nothing you lazy, self-absorbed jerkoff. Oh and for the record, smacking my ass and saying Happy Mother's Day is not in any way shape or form a heartfelt holiday wish. I also hope that you and your hand are very happy together as your penis will not be enjoying the confines of any of my orifices for quite some time.
Signed,
Your Very Rightfully Pissed Off Wife
Comments:
I'm sorry you had such a rotten Mother's Day... but this post is freaken hilarious! I agree that you should give him this letter. Hopefully next year he will do something nice.
What a douchey thing to do. You owe him an ass kicking.
Oh Diandra, I am sorry he sucks. I would make Father's Day REALLY special for him. Maybe I would do something like plan a day with just me and the girls. Alone. WIthout him. And leave him a note like say, this one.
Ditto what Schmoops said. And film it, upload it to YOUTUBE where he can watch it over and over again.
Yup.
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You should write this to him. Seriously, i mean it. Get a piece of paper and write it to him. Put it in an envelope if you want to but give it to him. Maybe he doesn't realize how much Mother's Day means to you and maybe he doesn't realize that he was being an ass, and he won't until you tell him. Maybe he doesn't realize that you feel unappreciated, but honey if you don't tell him he won't know. You can't read minds and neither can he.
Or you can be evil and conveniently 'forget' Father's Day, when it rolls around.
But you should talk to him so he knows how you feel. Or if you're too mad to talk, give him the letter you wrote for all of us to read. I'm sure that will open his eyes.
- chavela_carlita
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