I suffered a miscarriage. It was terrible. I have two healthy children and had never had a miscarriage before. We are now thinking about trying again. I have this weird notion about 'recapturing' my lost babies soul--I know, sounds morbid and crazy! But I just can't accept the idea of my child just being gone... like it was never there. I don't want a new soul, I want this one and so in some weird, probably not very healthy for healing way, I feel like if we could just concieve sooner than later, maybe God would give me this child back that I have lost.
But my doctor says that to become pregnant too soon (within 3 cycles) is likely to end in another miscarriage.
I know it is somewhat irrational to think I could maybe make a new body for my baby's soul but I don't know, I just want the one who was already mine. Even if it was only for just a little while. If anyone else has felt this way also, let me know please. My honey thinks I am crazy :) Maybe I am :) But no one kno

If you have suffered a miscarriage and concieved or are trying to concieve afterwards, how many menstral cycles did it take to become pregnant or how long has it been that you have been trying to become pregnant? Please leave anything at all that

  • Before my next cycle I was pregnant again!

  • One normal cycle and I was pregnant!

  • Two or three normal cycles...

  • Four to six...

  • Seven or more...

  • Still trying...

Take the poll to see moms who voted like you.
Take Poll
Submitted by at 6:18 PM on Dec. 28, 2008
Votes (31) Comments (15)

If you have suffered a miscarriage and concieved or are trying to concieve afterwards, how many menstral cycles did it take to become pregnant or how long has it been that you have been trying to become pregnant? Please leave anything at all that

Take the poll to see moms who voted like you.
I prefer not to answer
Show me the results first
Submitted by at 6:18 PM on Dec. 28, 2008
Votes (31) Comments (15)


  • Marynmomof...
    Submitted by   at 7:30 PM on December 28, 2008

    Hey, everyone mourns differently. Know and believe that if it is meant to be, it will. God, knows what he is doing. Trust Him. If you need to try now, do it. Docs are into science and fact. You need faith, right now, not what "ifs" and "might happens". Trust it and yourself. I'm sorry for your loss. That must be horrid to go through.

  • Angelgurl1...
    Submitted by   at 7:37 PM on December 28, 2008

    I get what you are saying. Once you have a new baby everything will feel the way its supposed to. Good luck.

  • Becky1979
    Submitted by   at 11:10 PM on December 30, 2008

    I see people vote but they don't comment. Please don't be intimdated by my way of dealing with my loss. I was just always very much like 'It wouldn't happen to me. I make healthy babies!' Nieve, I know. And so, having my children and feeling the way I do.... I just feel the way I do. Please share your thoughts and feelings! Do you think it is unsfe to try to early? Although I tend to lean towards my one commenter, it is personal, and I do believe in God, let His will be done. I just don't get it sometimes. And I have lost some folks to crazy circumstances lately so I guess I am trying to find to meeting point. :) Please don't be shy, I am here to talk to folks I don't have to look at and know they know my deepest hurts... they just hear and maybe respond...

  • SAHM_N_Luv...
    Submitted by   at 1:24 PM on December 31, 2008

    I haven't had a mc, so I didn't vote but I do want to leave a comment. I have heard many people who believe that when you have a mc, the same soul will try to return the next pregnancy, even when there are multiple mc's in a row. I happen to believe this is true also, so I don't think you're nuts at all! Good luck to you!

  • MizLee
    Submitted by   at 8:51 PM on December 31, 2008

    My 3rd pregnancy was a "surprise". Unfortunately we had a miscarriage which started a week after finding out our good news. Our children were 8 and 6 at the time- and we really were not trying for more children. After the loss I was bound and determined to have another child. I wanted what was so cruelly taken away. For us it took a year to get pregnant. Mostly that was due to work schedules, tired husband....
    What is kind of ironic is I got pregnant with the "lost" baby in March, and our 4th child was born in March. Where one life ended, another began. So I thought that was quite touching. The fact that he was born on my birthday was another sign that things were meant to be that way. I wish you alot of luck.

  • Becky1979
    Submitted by   at 8:24 PM on January 1, 2009

    Thanks ladies. This one was a surprise for us too. We had planned to have more, it was just a surprise for it to be so soon. I have been soooo sick and for some crazy reason this morning, in between me being sick and helping my son be sick :) I thought, 'Well, geeez, it is 5am. I should take a test right now while I feel like I have to go.' I don't know why cuz I haven't really thought about anything other than us being sick but, so I did. And it is positive. I haven't even told my old man yet. I am unhappy with him and being that I feel like crap, I don't feel like talking it out yet. He's being a nerd. Vomit makes him sick and my son, my daughter and myself have been sick since yesterday-- but as we are sick he isn't helping cuz he says can't handle to uck. GET OVER IT!!! When I am not sick I deal with them on my own but this time I AM SUPER SICK!!!! URRRGGGGHHHH!!! At midnight he woke me up to kiss my forehead and tell me it was the New Year and I thought 'Yeah, shitty way to celebrate.' And I went back to sleep. At 3am I was up and thought the same thing. At 4 am my son was up and I thought the same thing. At 5am both kids and I were up, in the bathroom again. I got them back down and I thought the same thing. And then I thought about the test. Now I think 'Sick and all, what a great, amazing way to start the new year!'
    I am still not telling him :) But I did decide to put the test out on the counter (I kept it, I know... gross! But I put the cover on it! I checked it as I went to the bathroom through the day-to make sure it was still real. I have been dreaming some weird stuff while sick. I had it hidden :) After I put the kids to bed I will put it back out and let him find it. He knows I am mad and I am not speaking first! Not this time! But then he will know too and he will have to apologize before talking to me! Cuz I know he will want to talk to me then! HA! :)
    I HAVE MY BABY BACK!!!! THANK GOD!!! Pray for us that we are healthy this time please! This is going to be a wonderful year!!!

  • Becky1979
    Submitted by   at 8:36 PM on January 1, 2009

    Oh, and one other thing. First, it has been just over a month since my miscarriage but I haven't had a period. So I guess I don't know if I would count that as a cycle. I lost my baby on Thanksgiving day. Second, I told my mom how I felt about all of this and she had some interesting insight. My family is sort of weird about talking about some things but she said she had had a miscarriage between my older brother and I. A year later I was born and she said it always struck her how people would comment from early on in my childhood that my eyes looked wise beyond my eyes, that I had an old soul. People have always told me this too. I don't think I am any wiser than the average Joe for the most part :) She had quietly always believed it was because my soul had been around longer than my body and had been waiting to come back to earth for good. She didn't think it was crazy that I feel like I want THIS baby's soul. Isn't that weird that 27 years later she finally tells me this?
    Keep trying you 11%, maybe they just are waiting for THEIR right time :)

  • Becky1979
    Submitted by   at 8:07 AM on January 5, 2009

    Well, update. When I took the test the one line came up very clear-- they other one came up but much more faded than the 'test' line. I thought I was still ok with saying that that was a safe positive because it doesn't come up unless the hormone associated with pregnancy is present. Apperantly I was wrong. I got my period and for a second freaked out thinking it could maybe be another MC but my honey pointed that point out and said I should retest. I did, with a better (I guess) brand and it said not pregnant. I guess I wasn't pregnant at all.
    DON'T USE THE BRAND 'ANSWERS'. I got 2 false (light second line) positives over two days. :( Usually I use EPT-- Answers was on sale. What stupid thing to buy the 'on sale' one when I trust the other one! URGH!
    So, I am back on board with the waiting girls. But my chin is up. :) This will happen.
    Has anyone else ever had a stupid positive when you really weren't? Am I wrong about how the test work? That is how the doc explained it to me. And, to be sure I had lost the baby, we tested my hormone levels for three days to see them drop but with blood. Point is is that it is all about the hormone levels. The exsistance of the hormone there period for the disposable ones. I am right, right? I really hate this...

  • Jen110786
    Submitted by   at 3:02 PM on January 5, 2009

    I didn't vote because I have never miscarried. However, my husbands cousin miscarried and got pregnant the next month afterwards and is now 12 weeks along. So far so good, but I have also heard that trying again too soon could cause problems, I'm just not sure how true it is. Good luck with whatever you decide.

  • lipstickcl...
    Submitted by   at 10:03 PM on January 5, 2009

    I think it was 2 cycles after my miscarriage that I got pregnant again.

Please Login to comment on this item.